Where to get help if you’re in an abusive relationship – NBC News

http://www.nbcnews.com/dateline/where-get-help-if-youre-abusive-relationship-n352046

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The First Glimmer of Recognition

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One of my Facebook friends shared this post from the Narcology Facebook page. It accurately described what my eyes had been opened to with JR since I gave up my apartment to live with him. I stayed another two months, he hit me again during a discussion, before I left him.

It was mind boggling, utterly confusing, how he went from being the Great Guy/Dr Jekyll and flipped the switch to Mr Hyde. At the time I had no idea what brought it on.

It would be two more months before I found myself in support groups. 

Two Years Ago

The first time that he hit me, we were at a restaurant with my “friends”. He smacked me in the face, in public, in front of my FRIENDS. He didn’t even pretend that it was an accident. He didn’t apologize. In fact, when I moved my chair away from him he yelled, “What?!? You don’t want to sit by me now?!?” I said, “You just hit me. NO I don’t want to sit by you now.” No response, no acknowledgement that he hit me. More pouting, more texting whomever, more nastiness.

Like most of what he did, it had more than one purpose. He had been verbally trying to beat me into submission all day, along with my youngest child. I was supposed to have a girls night out later that evening, but he threw such a fit about it that he ended up coming with.

Why do that, hit me in public, in front of who should have been my support system? He was testing to see what I would do, and what they would do. It’s no surprise then that she was who he used to harass and stalk me at work, as they did nothing.

Moving On

A new job fell in my lap a few weeks ago and I took it. I haven’t been actively looking or applied anywhere since February. The manager actually called me at work asking if I was interested in coming to work for them.

I was suspicious of the call, I wasn’t sure it was legitimate. Turns out it was. Better hours, much, MUCH better pay. They wooed me, which was so strange to me. Introducing me to the owner and various managers. It was all very surreal, and stressful at the same time.

I’ve had an eye twitch since the initial call. Anxiety about making such a huge change, even given the inaction of the company that let JR harass me through my job. I like the store I’ve been at since the end of February, and my coworkers.

My boss and another coworker tried to get our district manager to give me a raise to try to keep me there full time. But the fact of the matter is, it’s too little, too late. I had to leave my original store because they refused to protect me, refused to follow their own company policy, repeatedly.