I am shaking an numb and have been for the entire day. I started by oversleeping. I was surprised that I got any sleep at all last night. My day started out a little behind.
I met my co worker/friend at the court house. He agreed to come with so I didn’t have to go alone. My intention was to get a lawyer, but I was waiting on my tax refund to do so. They came later then I planned on, not in enough time to get council. Once inside I proceeded to make my “irrational panic attack” come true and couldn’t find the court room. When I finally found it and went inside right at 8:15 when it was supposed to start.
Of course he showed up. He brought with him a lawyer, (like I figured he would) his parents and some chick who looked slightly familiar, but not sure who she was. I thought for sure he would bring his side piece that he rubbed in my face the week before I left, but it wasn’t her.
He made sure to wear his work uniform. He likes using his job to get out of trouble, so to speak. I’ve seen him pull out his C.O. badge to try to get past a city work crew that blocked off a street. That was the first time he scared me with how angry he got, because he couldn’t go the way he wanted. He scared my youngest who was in the car with us as well. When he would spend the night at my house and have to park on the street, since he didn’t have a parking permit, he would put his work hat on the front dash to try to avoid a ticket. The day that I moved out, because I brought people to help me, he put on his work jacket to try to intimidate us. Like he’s a police officer.
The court commissioner started out by saying that there were three cases for injunctions scheduled for the same time this morning. Due to that, and time constraints, some people might have to come back at a later date. My stomach hit the floor hearing that. I had wanted to get this over with since first filing. I was momentarily happy that we were the first case called. Momentarily, it didn’t last long.
I was terrified, intimidated that I sat there alone, and that I had to testify to him posting naked pictures of me on the internet, in front of a court room full of people. I know my voice shook as I spoke, I could barely talk. My throat closed up almost as soon as I sat down at the front table. His lawyer started in on me about that immediately, which pissed me off. That helped me speak louder.
Thirteen years ago I had to get a domestic violence restraining order against the father of my youngest. That was entirely different from what I experienced today. That was in a small closed room, with only myself, the prosecutor, DV advocate, and a judge. (possibly a public defender, I can’t remember.) He had shown up, but then left. They had me present my case and I was granted the permanent order.
I had no idea what I was doing as far as the stalking/harassment order. The court commissioner asked me why I wanted the injunction. I started to tell him the events starting from when I moved out. He immediately told me that he had no idea what I was talking about when I said, “moved from there” (I believe I said there) that I had to give him more information. So I told him that by December 2013, we had been in a relationship for approximately one year. That I didn’t establish residence until October 2013, I had my own apartment up until then, but hadn’t spent much time at my apartment since May of that year.
I told him about Christmas Eve, and started to tell him about the texts, JR’s lawyer objected, I couldn’t say anything about them, it was considered hearsay because the person JR was texting wasn’t there. So I moved on to the naked pictures of me, he lawyer objected again, the commissioner told me I would have to “shore that one up later”. I then told him about JR repeatedly coming into my work, the last time he came in and how I had to leave the store.
JR’s lawyer got to ask me questions. He made it out that I only moved in with JR because I didn’t have electricity in my apartment. He also made it sound absurd that JR should have to drive to a different store.
I was sitting there waiting for the commissioner to ask to see my evidence. Instead he asked if I had anything else to “tell” him. I said no, being frustrated by all the objections. He then said case closed and proceeded to bitch me out for not having a case, and not showing evidence. I told him that I have the emails, I have proof of the pictures. He told me it was too late, that he was not granting the order, it was dismissed and that I could apply for a De Novo hearing.
By this time I almost wasn’t comprehending anything. I walked back to my friend and sat waiting for the paperwork. After receiving the paperwork from the bailiff, he told us to wait for a few minutes because JR and company were leaving the court room. We sat, I was reeling from not being able to show my evidence. Then another bailiff came to us and said we could leave now. We stood up, and a lady who was sitting in the back row stood up and approached me. I was relieved to see a sympathetic face and thought she was likely an advocate, and she introduced herself as such.
As we walked out of the court room I see that JR and company are standing right outside the court room door. I’m now thinking, why the hell did they tell me to leave the room if he’s still standing outside??? The bailiff then proceeded to try to bully me out of the court house, repeatedly stating, “You’re going out to your car, right?!?” I responded yes to him, and continued to talk to the advocate, and he said again, “YOU’RE GOING OUT TO YOUR CAR, RIGHT??” He said this at least three times, in succession. I was irritated since I already responded to him the first time. The advocate told him no, I was going to get paperwork for the De Novo hearing. None of his fucking business was what I was thinking, since he wasn’t escorting me anywhere. As soon as he heard that he turned and walked back to JR and company.